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Nearing the Two Year Mark
It’s been a while since I’ve posted. That’s not to say it’s been that long since I’ve written though. This is currently my 18th attempt at successfully hitting that pesky little ‘publish’ button. But as I inch closer to the my two year sober anniversary I would really like to talk things through with you…
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One Year Down….
This is a picture of my latest painting. I poured a lot into this one and it tells quite a story. A story of a withering being, held up by the intricate and dense root system that’s been there for years, quietly supporting. This bare being has finally begun to allow the life giving rays…
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Still Pinching Myself
The past month or so has been a bit surreal for me and, quite honestly, I’m still trying to figure out if parts of it have been a dream. Every year, the company I work for has what they call a Road Show where the CEO recaps the past year and gives the projection for…
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Holding Tight to Gratitude
The first week of January, 2017, is done. I’m not quite sure how I feel about things. Hopefully by writing today, it will filter the murky waters. The last couple months have really put an exclamation point on the ‘bittersweetness’ that was 2016 for me and my family. The last two months have been pretty…
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My Journey Thus Far….In Art
Hey look! It’s my ‘sober art.’ I have been having a really hard time posting this one. My instinct is to over explain why I’m making, what I see to be, as a sort of boastful post. It is so strange how anxious I am as I fight this instinct. After all, I have been…
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Well, that was harder than expected….
The last couple weeks have proven, beyond any doubt, how ridiculous my naive optimism can be. My mental state has been put to the test and has emerged with a solid D-. While Dave was out of town, it was also UEA, so the boys both had sleepovers at friends houses. I still had to…
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Six Months Sober
This is one of those posts I started writing about twelve times, just to delete it and start again. I think I have figured out why it’s been so hard to put into words what my feelings have been over the last couple weeks. When October 1st came and this milestone was reached, what seemed…
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Anxiety? There’s an app for that.
These last few weeks have been a delicate tightrope walk, constantly catching myself before falling off one side into the depths depression, or the other side into the spiraling chaos of anxiety. The clarity I have from the absence of any chemicals has helped me navigate my way back up to the rope when I have…
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Turned off the Fog Machine and Shed my Wet Clothes
A couple of weeks ago I made the decision to take medication out of my life for a while. The initial plan was just to cut my dose in half, but thanks to the deeds of a dishonest computer, I ended up taking them out completely. I had been getting increasingly frustrated with the combination…
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Ebbs and Flows
The last couple weeks have been incredibly difficult to maneuver through. Every time I feel like my feet are planted firmly, a huge wave of depression comes and sucks the sand out from underneath me, sending me tumbling into a washing machine of anxiety and despair. It has been incredibly frustrating. I miss the speed and…