Category: Journal

  • Overcome with Gratitude

    Writing about my journey so far has been incredibly therapeutic for me. The crippling weight of the armor I have built up over the years has become lighter with every entry. I have begun to accept my feelings instead of burring them. It has been very safe, private, protected….until today. I didn’t quite prepare myself for […]

  • Keep Busy, Stay Sober

    Keep Busy, Stay Sober

    Friday was crazy busy at work, which I like for the most part. I always feel very accomplished when I have those days. I am a bit behind because of how crazy it was, but I will get ahold of things tomorrow morning, with my hopefully realistic list. There are multiple times in any given […]

  • Quieting the Mind

    Quieting the Mind

    Tonight was group and more often than not, I leave feeling a little lighter, with a little more hope, and with a smile on my face. I am so grateful for these nights. One of the things we talked through and processed was quieting the mind. Sometimes when your head is full of stress, thoughts, […]

  • Hope

    Hope

    This week has been exhausting. Group on Monday was different. Our usual counselor wasn’t there and the energy of the person who filled in was nothing like what I am used to in that intimate setting. There was something that was pointed out and it made me think a lot. I had been having a […]

  • Still navigating the darkness

    Still navigating the darkness

    Today is rainy and cool. It is my favorite weather. If Portland’s weather norm could come here to stay, Utah would have it all in my mind. I feel that today will be a nice, productive day. The list of things I want to get done before my crazy work week starts is a long […]

  • Keep on baby stepping

    Keep on baby stepping

    5/14/16 No group yesterday and for the first time, it felt a little easier to make it through my day. It helped that work was non stop and so was my evening. Going with the family to dinner with Dave’s parents which is always fun, and watching a movie when we got home. My day […]

  • Boundaries

    Boundaries

    5/12/16 This day started out pretty stressful and full of anxiety. Work was crazy but the anxiety came mostly from having to go to court with my son. We did receive the best possible outcome of the situation and we are all so grateful for that. It felt good to be done with that part, […]

  • Turning a corner

    Turning a corner

    5/11/16 This morning I woke up with much less pain. I am so thankful for that. I decided to do some mediation, mindfulness and positive self talk this morning as well as some exercising. It’s amazing the difference all these things make when you actually DO them and not just think or read about them. […]

  • Family night

    Family night

    5/10/16 Tonight was family night and I took my therapists advice by inviting my parents to come. This was way out of my comfort zone giving them a window to this part of my world. Pretty sure my blood pressure was in the danger zone most of the day and the whole class. It was good […]

  • Mother’s Day and Step One

    Mother’s Day and Step One

    5/9/16 Yesterday was Mother’s Day. There’s no way of saying this without sounding like a narcissist, but it was hard for me. I realize it was about a billion other mothers, but it was rough for me. It was hard to see others so happy being celebrated when I feel like such a piece of […]