Nearing the Two Year Mark

It’s been a while since I’ve posted. That’s not to say it’s been that long since I’ve written though. This is currently my 18th attempt at successfully hitting that pesky little ‘publish’ button. But as I inch closer to the my two year sober anniversary I would really like to talk things through with you… Continue reading Nearing the Two Year Mark

One Year Down….

This is a picture of my latest painting. I poured a lot into this one and it tells quite a story. A story of a withering being, held up by the intricate and dense root system that’s been there for years,  quietly supporting. This bare being has finally begun to allow the life giving rays… Continue reading One Year Down….

Still Pinching Myself

The past month or so has been a bit surreal for me and, quite honestly, I’m still trying to figure out if parts of it have been a dream. Every year, the company I work for has what they call a Road Show where the CEO recaps the past year and gives the projection for… Continue reading Still Pinching Myself

Holding Tight to Gratitude

The first week of January, 2017, is done. I’m not quite sure how I feel about things. Hopefully by writing today, it will filter the murky waters. The last couple months have really put an exclamation point on the ‘bittersweetness’ that was 2016 for me and my family. The last two months have been pretty… Continue reading Holding Tight to Gratitude

Well, that was harder than expected….

The last couple weeks have proven, beyond any doubt, how ridiculous my naive optimism can be. My mental state has been put to the test and has emerged with a solid D-. While Dave was out of town, it was also UEA, so the boys both had sleepovers at friends houses. I still had to… Continue reading Well, that was harder than expected….

Six Months Sober

This is one of those posts I started writing about twelve times, just to delete it and start again. I think I have figured out why it’s been so hard to put into words what my feelings have been over the last couple weeks. When October 1st came and this milestone was reached, what seemed… Continue reading Six Months Sober

Anxiety? There’s an app for that.

These last few weeks have been a delicate tightrope walk, constantly catching myself before falling off one side into the depths depression, or the other side into the spiraling chaos of anxiety. The clarity I have from the absence of any chemicals has helped me navigate my way back up to the rope when I have… Continue reading Anxiety? There’s an app for that.

Turned off the Fog Machine and Shed my Wet Clothes

A couple of weeks ago I made the decision to take medication out of my life for a while. The initial plan was just to cut my dose in half, but thanks to the deeds of a dishonest computer, I ended up taking them out completely. I had been getting increasingly frustrated with the combination… Continue reading Turned off the Fog Machine and Shed my Wet Clothes

Ebbs and Flows

The last couple weeks have been incredibly difficult to maneuver through. Every time I feel like my feet are planted firmly, a huge wave of depression comes and sucks the sand out from underneath me, sending me tumbling into a washing machine of anxiety and despair. It has been incredibly frustrating. I miss the speed and… Continue reading Ebbs and Flows

What condition my condition is in at 100 days sober.

Well, bust out the bubbly…..apple cider….this girl just hit the 100 days sober mark! For 100, I dare say we up the wow factor and splurge for the good stuff. Martinelli’s. This is officially the longest completely dry run I have had in 14 years. I am a little frustrated that I haven’t lost more… Continue reading What condition my condition is in at 100 days sober.