This is a picture of my latest painting. I poured a lot into this one and it tells quite a story. A story of a withering being, held up by the intricate and dense root system that’s been there for years, quietly supporting. This bare being has finally begun to allow the life giving rays… Continue reading One Year Down….
The past month or so has been a bit surreal for me and, quite honestly, I’m still trying to figure out if parts of it have been a dream. Every year, the company I work for has what they call a Road Show where the CEO recaps the past year and gives the projection for… Continue reading Still Pinching Myself
The first week of January, 2017, is done. I’m not quite sure how I feel about things. Hopefully by writing today, it will filter the murky waters. The last couple months have really put an exclamation point on the ‘bittersweetness’ that was 2016 for me and my family. The last two months have been pretty… Continue reading Holding Tight to Gratitude
The last couple weeks have proven, beyond any doubt, how ridiculous my naive optimism can be. My mental state has been put to the test and has emerged with a solid D-. While Dave was out of town, it was also UEA, so the boys both had sleepovers at friends houses. I still had to… Continue reading Well, that was harder than expected….
These last few weeks have been a delicate tightrope walk, constantly catching myself before falling off one side into the depths depression, or the other side into the spiraling chaos of anxiety. The clarity I have from the absence of any chemicals has helped me navigate my way back up to the rope when I have… Continue reading Anxiety? There’s an app for that.
The last couple weeks have been incredibly difficult to maneuver through. Every time I feel like my feet are planted firmly, a huge wave of depression comes and sucks the sand out from underneath me, sending me tumbling into a washing machine of anxiety and despair. It has been incredibly frustrating. I miss the speed and… Continue reading Ebbs and Flows
This week has been a rough one, emotionally, and yesterday it seemed to hit a peak. I was so grateful to have an incredibly busy day at work to keep me focussed on something other than my attempt at reigning in the bucking broncos in my mind. I finally got into a doctor earlier this… Continue reading Smoothing out the Lumps
Last night, at family night, I was lucky enough to not only have Dave with me, but one of my very best friends. If I went into detail here of our lives together, it would turn into a novel, and though I assure you it would kick ass, I’ll keep it simple and say, she and… Continue reading Family Night
Today is rainy and cool. It is my favorite weather. If Portland’s weather norm could come here to stay, Utah would have it all in my mind. I feel that today will be a nice, productive day. The list of things I want to get done before my crazy work week starts is a long… Continue reading Still navigating the darkness
5/9/16 Yesterday was Mother’s Day. There’s no way of saying this without sounding like a narcissist, but it was hard for me. I realize it was about a billion other mothers, but it was rough for me. It was hard to see others so happy being celebrated when I feel like such a piece of… Continue reading Mother’s Day and Step One